Everyday Narcissists: On How Normal People Turn Into Self-Righteous Heartbreakers
One truth a day keeps the doctor away.
One must be able to take people’s reactions to what one has said or asked to someone, no matter how much it doesn’t make sense to oneself or appears preposterous; try to understand — after all, you’re the one engaging them in the interaction, expecting a response: and that so happens to be their response.
If you attack them for saying back what they say, what that means is that you don’t care enough about your relationship to them, because you’re communicating to them nonverbally that they don’t deserve to think the way they do (have their point of view) and that they can’t speak to you in a certain degrading way yet you can — because you lack insight and empathy — insight into how you come off to others in that state and empathy towards how others too have feelings and deserving needs in that interaction, not just you.
All in all, you believe they must obey you no matter what, for you are right…In this, you’re reenacting the one-up position that was once enacted by your caregiver to you.
And you may even be super hot, likable, and social, yet when you come home, this is going to be how you’re interacting with and responding to the people you’ve gotten familiar with, and you won’t care that you’ve hurt them, not only because no one outside is watching you, but because figuratively, you do not even watch yourself, no sight, no insight: you don’t know that you’ve hurt them.
Author: Iffah Suraya
